Career couselling 21/1/16

I ever enter a counselling before, this would be my first time formally enter to counselling centre even though is career counselling centre.
I'm not very excited about it, but after the counselling session it really helped me a lot.. not only in career also in others.
This counselling had reminded me back, the pain in my heart
I know that pain is still inside my soul, sometimes I just ignore it, I have forgotten, slowly become one part of my body.
I think it is ok, I think I have overcame, but actually not.
the pain is still keep growing without I noticing it
I don't know when I had develop such kind of minded that is
comparing with other people.
Is very hard for me to delete this mind set in my mind .
I  desperately feel that
*I'm not good *I did  not try my best* I am Stupid* Why I'm here* I have no talent*
no matter how many "A", what subjects did I got in SPM or PMR (3A and 4A) very bad, rite?
other people were surprised that I got "A" in my English, I didn't feel surprised or what ...feel nothing
I'm not satisfied with it, I still will think that "Am I not hardworking enough?"

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