当然，有时候会想要自杀但没有哪个勇气
也很感谢你们养到位这么大。
也曾想过，我死后是否还有人关心我。
应该会有人哭， 但过后都没什么吧...存在感底的人
我是最差的在家
现在，我没信心，我不知道我有没有哪个资格去读哪个科
我不是什么读书的料，怕自己半途而废浪费了那么的多钱
可是，自己又很想读那一个科
嘛的。。。。。FUCK!
2016年8月23日星期二
Haha....
http://www.fashionwaltz.com/?p=45582
I had been seeing counselor from Semester 2 to Semester 4, it a long journey to me and her.
Officially, my counseling session has ended, but problems seem to be here till now. Notice the problems, but the method to solve are still searching. Is difficult to find the solution even u know the problems. For me, EQ is one of the resistant to move further? Maybe yes, maybe no? I feel more comfortable in certain ways because I have used to be. Conversely, the feeling make me feel sick. Is the same problems....
Yes, after the counseling I feel much more better to myself. I feel more happier than before, I have found myself, more confident.
But when come to the problem which is the same problems I have been facing it before, I feel the badass in myself keep thinking of I am not good enough in everything academic, relationships and etc. It is truth for me because I really not good enough compare to my brother & sister. I am the extraordinary normal in my house. I not clever, not humor whatsoever I seem useless in this house. And to my dad, I don't feel any feeling from you, I not really like you honestly. Every times, when discuss something with you I always loss my patient to you. Like what my counselor said I can't avoiding him forever, ha... I don't know what else I can do. For exp, I will wake up later even I have awoke early but I till keep myself in the sheet just because don't want to see you. Haha...
Ha...sound a bit serious lol...
That's way I want to grow more older ? XD
So, I won't depend on you so much.
Haiz.. should I solve the problem?
我能说我不是你的骄傲。
I had been seeing counselor from Semester 2 to Semester 4, it a long journey to me and her.
Officially, my counseling session has ended, but problems seem to be here till now. Notice the problems, but the method to solve are still searching. Is difficult to find the solution even u know the problems. For me, EQ is one of the resistant to move further? Maybe yes, maybe no? I feel more comfortable in certain ways because I have used to be. Conversely, the feeling make me feel sick. Is the same problems....
Yes, after the counseling I feel much more better to myself. I feel more happier than before, I have found myself, more confident.
But when come to the problem which is the same problems I have been facing it before, I feel the badass in myself keep thinking of I am not good enough in everything academic, relationships and etc. It is truth for me because I really not good enough compare to my brother & sister. I am the extraordinary normal in my house. I not clever, not humor whatsoever I seem useless in this house. And to my dad, I don't feel any feeling from you, I not really like you honestly. Every times, when discuss something with you I always loss my patient to you. Like what my counselor said I can't avoiding him forever, ha... I don't know what else I can do. For exp, I will wake up later even I have awoke early but I till keep myself in the sheet just because don't want to see you. Haha...
Ha...sound a bit serious lol...
That's way I want to grow more older ? XD
So, I won't depend on you so much.
Haiz.. should I solve the problem?
我能说我不是你的骄傲。
2016年8月15日星期一
2016年8月3日星期三
Wow~
John, 是电脑那些part time job认识的
过后，就出来见个面聊那些 job scope.
他说“ 我有pontential 做哪些 politic 的东西
哇～
还有在whatsapps 讲看到我有potential
他当我妹妹一样。
他还真的很好， 教我很多东西
差不多每次，都会叫我读那些可以inspire你的书
prepare your mind to win.
The hardest situition, the hardest the person.
当他讲每天读15-30 min 我吓到
哈哈。。谁会想读呢？
在这个年纪， 真的对未来很有用
虽然，现在看不到
但知道， 以后真的会有帮助
就好象，你已经忘记了， 至少有人在提醒你
这个society, 人好像忘记阅读了
在乎的是，吃，吃，吃，享乐。。。
不知道，有时候他们有没有想到外面的世界乱糟糟？
疾病? 污染？天灾？ 难民？ 政府？ 恐怖分子？ 食物？
有些人，连最基本的都没有。。。
每一个美好，背后都是心酸
过后，就出来见个面聊那些 job scope.
他说“ 我有pontential 做哪些 politic 的东西
哇～
还有在whatsapps 讲看到我有potential
他当我妹妹一样。
他还真的很好， 教我很多东西
差不多每次，都会叫我读那些可以inspire你的书
prepare your mind to win.
The hardest situition, the hardest the person.
当他讲每天读15-30 min 我吓到
哈哈。。谁会想读呢？
在这个年纪， 真的对未来很有用
虽然，现在看不到
但知道， 以后真的会有帮助
就好象，你已经忘记了， 至少有人在提醒你
这个society, 人好像忘记阅读了
在乎的是，吃，吃，吃，享乐。。。
不知道，有时候他们有没有想到外面的世界乱糟糟？
疾病? 污染？天灾？ 难民？ 政府？ 恐怖分子？ 食物？
有些人，连最基本的都没有。。。
每一个美好，背后都是心酸
A little gathering
Last Saturday, 30/7
before two days end of Raya, finally 5sc2 had a small gathering, was a very appreciate day to me.
But the first, really need to thank to Cikgu Aisah even she doesn't who am I, the most important thing is I remember her.
I don't very like be friend with teachers, seem awkward to me. I don't know what kind of topics can talk to them, although they do not care at all what kind of rubbish u talk at. They are the best adviser, they threat their students sincerely. Is like our second parents.
We spent most of the time at school, so some of them they are clearly understand than parents.
Teachers, is the most precious gift from God to all people. They guide us. They do whatever to benefits their students. They always try their best.
O..ok is out of topics already.
Get back~
I really miss my desk-mate Ummi and Anis.
I really miss them 5SC2.
Really miss those old good days.
Miss you all. Miss you all. Miss you all
I dk what can I say other than miss you.
Muack~~
before two days end of Raya, finally 5sc2 had a small gathering, was a very appreciate day to me.
But the first, really need to thank to Cikgu Aisah even she doesn't who am I, the most important thing is I remember her.
I don't very like be friend with teachers, seem awkward to me. I don't know what kind of topics can talk to them, although they do not care at all what kind of rubbish u talk at. They are the best adviser, they threat their students sincerely. Is like our second parents.
We spent most of the time at school, so some of them they are clearly understand than parents.
Teachers, is the most precious gift from God to all people. They guide us. They do whatever to benefits their students. They always try their best.
O..ok is out of topics already.
Get back~
I really miss my desk-mate Ummi and Anis.
I really miss them 5SC2.
Really miss those old good days.
Miss you all. Miss you all. Miss you all
I dk what can I say other than miss you.
Muack~~
2016年7月13日星期三
去PENANG, 有跑去看那些命。。
也不算是什么，只是要知道你的年龄就可以
比较讲现在的， 没有以后会有什么东西出现/以后·有什么发展·
讲我怕什么都怕
怕输不起， 给人讲没有问题的。
人在这里，心不动跑去那里
怕答案写对/错
读书，读书到哭，是有啦
我自己也不清楚，我明明不比别人上心，我自己觉得我读书比较cinca
都不懂我要干嘛，心不在，随便读书，我输不起什么阿~？
haiz。。什么事都不要怕
敢敢去做。
我是属于第6型人格
不懂叫什么了
就是什么都怕， 性格上，做东西方面还蛮像的。
有想法，可是要别人的支持
-有责任
-承偌感
-团队感
-值得信赖的partner
希望，可以克服。这样我可以更好
也不算是什么，只是要知道你的年龄就可以
比较讲现在的， 没有以后会有什么东西出现/以后·有什么发展·
讲我怕什么都怕
怕输不起， 给人讲没有问题的。
人在这里，心不动跑去那里
怕答案写对/错
读书，读书到哭，是有啦
我自己也不清楚，我明明不比别人上心，我自己觉得我读书比较cinca
都不懂我要干嘛，心不在，随便读书，我输不起什么阿~？
haiz。。什么事都不要怕
敢敢去做。
我是属于第6型人格
不懂叫什么了
就是什么都怕， 性格上，做东西方面还蛮像的。
有想法，可是要别人的支持
-有责任
-承偌感
-团队感
-值得信赖的partner
希望，可以克服。这样我可以更好
2016年7月1日星期五
:) damn it
A jerk, will never respect other's views
Jerk, is ignorance
He think his solution is the best,
the world is keep changing, why you can't accept something new?
can't you just accept it?
FUCK U!
never listen other people,
maybe u listen other people, but not us
how u can just believe someone more than your family?
I really hate you!
yes, I hope I can get off here, how you still my Xx
I damn really do not want to talk someone who does not respect US
especially, your most lovely one
有其父必有其子...
I really don't to say someone bad.
I can't tolerance anymore, sometimes
both of you have the same problems .....
Jerk, is ignorance
He think his solution is the best,
the world is keep changing, why you can't accept something new?
can't you just accept it?
FUCK U!
never listen other people,
maybe u listen other people, but not us
how u can just believe someone more than your family?
I really hate you!
yes, I hope I can get off here, how you still my Xx
I damn really do not want to talk someone who does not respect US
especially, your most lovely one
有其父必有其子...
I really don't to say someone bad.
I can't tolerance anymore, sometimes
both of you have the same problems .....
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